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but it seems like its an acting job. at least in part. that's hard to do good the first time you try. or the 5th time. I think everyone has given you good advice, have a good idea of what your partner wants and a loose idea of how to get there and just go with it. maybe he could write out a 'script' not for you to follow exactly but maybe some good scenarios, phrases etc would help a lot. I have had some lovers who almost needed to hear certain things. once I figured out what they were things got really good :) 
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